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Archive for January 29th, 2009

BEFORE and AFTER

ON JULY 19, 2007, A month before I went to Law School, I posted this note on my Facebook Account:

Sunglasses–shades–y’know, those nifty little thing you put over your eyes to…uh…shade them from the glare of the sun. Yeah, those. They’re not really for me.

God, on a face like mine and my non-existent nose? Every time I smile or laugh, those things just get in the way. Afterall, they’re not REALLY resting on my ears and nose like they’re supposed to. They’re on my goddamn cheeks…because my nose…it’s not doing its job.

But then, I’m in LA for the next three years.

And it’s too damned sunny.

Future’s so bright, I gotta wear shades.

Two Days ago, January 27, 2009, I filled out those random little chain questionaires my friends “tagged” me with. The Rule was to list 25 Things about Yourself that Others may Not know about you:

#5. I always wanted to be a Writer, but I went to Law School instead. Now, I can’t write anything.

#15. If I didn’t make it as a Lawyer or a writer, I would be a Wedding Planner, and form a Partnership with my roommate with profits and losses specifically allocated on the Partnership Agreement. We will get sh*t done. I swear.

#16. Being a Law Student is the first time in my life I didn’t feel smart enough.

#17. Being a Law Student is the first time in my life I was honestly broke, that I can’t even look a Bum on the street in the eyes. I don’t have money to give, and I can no longer offer empathy or kindness, either.

#24. I get Frustrated by People who are SLOW. I think I would like to set a precedent of suing people who slow down the economy, the traffic, and the everyday life of Others.

#25. I used to smile when I woke up. I used to smile a lot. Now, not so much. Got Law School?

I think it’s very telling about how Law School really does change people. My first semester as a 1L, I was bright and idealistic. I wanted the to Change the World. Now, I’m just cynical, slightly jaded by the system, and just hope I Don’t Change Myself. Too much. Because it’s happened already, and it takes a lot of self-awareness to stop the bitterness from overtaking every. single. aspect. of. my. life.

So, I started a Blog.

Perhaps, I can rant, rave, and help myself stay myself through this blog.

I’m still gonna need those shades for the future, but I think it’s because I just like seeing grays now.

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