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Posts Tagged ‘funny’

*Facepalm*

OH FILIPINOS!
Signs seen around the Philippines.

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DSC03207 cropped and fixed

June 19 ’09 Weekend was the Road Trip to SD weekend with my buddy, PMaster.

8:30 AM on Friday, I pick him up from LAX.  Yeah, it’s early. But he’s a morning person…hell, he’s a crack-of-dawn person because of his job.  So, I’m a few minutes late, but I pick him up from the airport.

Highlights:

  • Tacos from Hope Street Farmer’s Market.
  • Singing out loud in the car driving towards San Diego
  • Bomb-ass hotel room at the Hilton
  • Riding the Trolley to Petco Park
  • LET’S GO OAKLAND!!!

  • Walking around Gaslamp District throwing out ideas for the next big thing.
  • Sea World!!!

  • Shamu! Shamu! Shamu!
  • Journey to Atlantis and the look of pure fear on my face.
  • Adventure Zone
  • Hooters and booty-slapping
  • Kayaking at La Jolla!!!

  • Flipping over on my kayak and freaking out about Leopard sharks
  • Long walks on the beach that = super super sunburned feet!
  • Crispy actually listening to the Wicked Soundtrack in my car!?!?!  whoa.
  • KMart Adventures

Aaah…fun times. Awesome weekend with an awesome friend.

Let's Go Oakland! @ Petco Park

Let's Go Oakland! @ Petco Park

Shamu! Shamu! Shamu!

Shamu! Shamu! Shamu!

Kayakers

Kayakers

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Aaahhh, the brain-mouth disconnect strikes again!

My lovely friend, JJC, and I were standing casually at Standard, waiting on some of our friends to meet up with us so we can leave the lovely rooftop bar and head home.

I won’t admit to being drunk.

I had a happy glow.

Guy separates himself from the crowd.  Now, he was drunk.  He stumbled slightly and made a beeline straight for us.

“Are you ladies single?”

Aw, shit.

I panic.  My brain short circuits and the only words that come out of my mouth is the song playing in my head:  “Bay Arrreeaaahhh!!!”  I holler.  And I’m  happily glowing just enough to add some enthusiasm into that, too.

Siiigh.  At that point, I was more than happy to step back and let JJC take the reins.  In fact, I wished I could somehow dissolve into nothingness, melt into a puddle, or just go poof! and disappear.

I can never handle being hit on straight.  Where’s the wit, where’s the charm?  Where’s the disarming me?

Instead, I get all discombobulated.

Oh well…

IMG_6613 edit bw

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He’s cute.

I would have gone out with him.  Really.

So, after our last dance that night, he says, “So, is it okay if I call you?”

*…pause…* I’m trying to digest the words, trying to understand if he’s asking for my number or just throwing me a line.  The music is loud, pounding, drowning everything around me.

I lean closer to him, “What?” I asked.

He grins.  “I said, I’d like to call you, can I get your number?”

The answer would have been so freakin’, darned, gosh-diggity easy.  Seven little digits I’ve memorized by heart.  Cute guy. Seemed kind of fun. I would have dated him.

Except, I have a mind-mouth coordination problem, and the words that come out of my mouth were: “I don’t know, can you?”

The moment the words come out of my mouth, I am utterly, disgustingly embarrassed.  WTF.  In my sheer embarrassment, I spin around and walk towards @Sigh and Eon.  I chance one glance over my shoulder and the poor guy is walking away sorta scratching his head.

Yeah, me too.

Can I please just get better at this dating game now?

…and someone somewhere is laughing, “I don’t know, can you?”

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Hmm…

I need to start blogging again.
But time escapes me.
Or maybe…more honestly…I’m running away again. I’m burying myself in BUSY-ness. I don’t want to think…don’t want to put into words every fear and hope that floats inside of me…

But I did have a strange dream last night.

I had a rooster-dog…yep.  It had the head of a rooster, the body of a dog, and FOUR rooster feet.  It kept following me around wanting to be petted.  If I didn’t, it would peck me.  WTF.  What did I eat last night.  In that dream, my brother says to me in supreme annoyance, “Why couldn’t you get one with the head of a dog so it’s easier to pet?”

Oh, I don’t know. Why couldn’t I?

And then later in the same strange dream, there is a break-out of animals and a lamb is attempting to escape.  In this dream, the lamb is not a gangly galloping little creature…it’s more like a beanie baby attempting to crawl along the floor.  My mother tells me, “Pick that one up and put it back in its cage.”  So, I did.  It’s as floppy and soft as a beanie baby.  I place it inside this little cage and it bleats, looking at me so woefully, “Baaahh…” in a small, little lamb voice.  I say, “Awwww….” and the beanie baby looks at me and says, “But it’s my birthday.”

WTF.

At that point I figure it’s time to wake up.

But interlaced in the dream, somewhere in the kaleidescope of weird, there’s a moment where I’m with HIM.  We’re sitting together, and I looked at him, then said: “I don’t want you anymore. Go away.”  HE looks completely torn, heartbroken, and he leaves.

I felt panic.  I’ve sent HIM away?!?!?!

The dream, after that scene, is edged with a sense of panic.

I wake up after the sheep has bleat-talked to me and I shoot up out of bed.  And feel relief.  I haven’t sent him away after all.  It was just a dream…rooster-dog & beanie bag talking sheep and all.

It was just a dream.

And I’m bittersweet today because I’m relieved it was just a dream.

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Summer movies I’d like to Watch:

1. Terminator: Salvation

  • Because I have always been a huge fan of the franchise.
  • Because it’s just my kind of action adventure.
  • Because it’s Christian Bale. Durh.

2. X-Men Origins: Wolverine

  • Because I’ve been into X-Men since I was 5 years old.
  • Because this is just my kind of kick-ass movie.
  • Because it’s HUGH JACKMAN. ‘Nuff said.

3. Harry Potter & the Half-Blood Prince

  • Because I’ve invested money watching the last 5 flicks
  • I haven’t read the book, but I heard this one was the best installment.
  • Because…well, it’s Harry Potter.

4. Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen

  • If I was ten years younger, I’d be into Shia.
  • Because I watched the first movie 3 times in the theaters and clapped when Optimus Prime busted out.
  • Because I used to have the toys when I was a kid.
  • Because it’s got cool robot action.

5. Angels & Demons

  • I liked the book loads.
  • I am hoping they make amends for utterly screwing up the Da Vinci Code

6. The Proposal

  • Ryan Reynolds’ body.
  • Romantic Comedy. Durh.

7. 500 Days of Summer

  • Quirky movie
  • Great buzz from Sundance
  • 3rd Rock kid all growed up. Aww.

8. Public Enemies

  • Johnny Depp as a Gangster. Hells yeah!
  • Christian Bale. Durh.
  • Gonna be a great storyline.  Expect deepness.

9. The Brothers Bloom

  • It’s FUN!!! Quirky!!! Entertaining!!!
  • It’s full of people that aren’t perfect-looking but really just…you’ll fall in love with them right away anyway.

10. Ghosts of Girlfriends Past

  • Oh, c’mon. Don’t begrudge me my Romantic comedies, okay?
  • I love people with dimples and Matthew McConaughey & Jennifer Garner both have dimples.

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Sleepless

Ugh.

So, last night, I couldn’t sleep until around 2:30 in the morning.  Know why? Because I was just watching Supernatural.

I watched Season 4, Episode 11: Family Remains, and even just by the clip below, I can guarantee you…just the tiniest bit of paranoia.

So, obviously, last night, I was wondering about creepy people hiding in the walls, about doors that open by themselves, and crazy screaming ghosts with knives coming at me.

Eventually, my great and rational intellect told me that I live in an apartment complex, and the sounds I hear through my walls are my next door neighbors…not killer white faced monsters.

And I finally fell asleep.

Watch Supernatural on CW, Thursdays 9/8c.  Good times…

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Darn. I Just Cut My Hair

Last Tuesday, I cut my hair which had fallen midway down my back, to just beneath my collarbone.  I also decided on bangs.  If I were anyone else, it would have been a big change.  But I’ve had all sorts of haircuts before (from pixie boy hair with little curly spikes, to tightly curled perms, to simple down-my-back layers).

However, tonight, I went to dinner with one of my best friends from college.  She has incredibly long hair.  It goes well past her elbows and curls awesomely.  She has also always been fabulous at styling all that hair.  She’s one of those people who actually have the desire and PATIENCE to fix her hair.  When I had long hair, it always went up in a pony tail or a messy bun.  But she also had a secret weapon that I have tried countless times, but has never worked for me.  It’s the lowest maintenance Updo a girl could do.  See her Youtube video which I’ve posted behind the cut (click on link).

Seeing that video again, when I used to see it all the time when we would grab lunch in college made me wish I hadn’t cut my hair just yet.  Darn.

(more…)

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